I had a wee day off from the Love Dare yesterday … just the book, not the striving to be a better parent part though! Our weekend seems to have passed in a blur and we’re starting a new week already. It’s an exciting week as the advent calendars will be started and the real countdown to Christmas can begin. I love Christmas and the excitement of the Junior GGs.
This year the boys have chocolate advent calendars (what else!), Mr GG a gingerbread advent calendar and I’ve got a Yankee Candle one (better for my waistline!). We’ve also prepared an advent calendar of things to do for the month so the plan is that the boys will be helping with the decorating, making Christmas Crackers and doing some of the Christmas baking … if it all works out I’ll be sitting with a cuppa watching the candles burn while they do all the work …
Anyway, back to the Love Dare. Today has been another “sink in my seat, lower my head in shame” day.
Love is not irritable.
Oh dear me.
Oh very dear me.
Surely I’m not alone in realising that my reactions (and tendency to irritability) directly correlate to circumstances … am I??? If, for example, one of the Junior GGs is washing the dishes and breaks a mug I will usually not be that bothered, it’s just a mug. However, if one of the Junior GGs is washing the dishes and breaks a mug when maybe I’m annoyed with Mr GG over something then it becomes much harder not to completely over-react … MY FAVOURITE MUG IS BROKEN, LIFE WILL NEVER BE THE SAME AGAIN, WOE IS ME!
It’s natural to be irritable and grumpy at times, we’re human, but the problem is when circumstances cause us to be irritable with our children when they’ve not really earned it. A broken mug is not that big a deal and would be wrong of me to get cranky about a genuine accident just because I’m a bit crabbit about something else.
This is a huge area I need to work on. I’ve a tendency to over-react sometimes (Mr GG is probably smiling to himself reading this … or even tempted to ask me to remove the word “sometimes” … if he’s brave enough) and I’ve even more of a tendency to allow circumstances to affect my reactions to unrelated events … like the mug. I’m aware of my failings and, believe it or not, I do try to temper my responses. I could blame it all on my red hair but I don’t know that there’s any scientific proof for red-heads being fiery (but if anyone can provide some proof I’d be delighted!).
I’ve lost count of the times I’ve over-reacted about a minor incident at home, been really crabby and irritable with the boys (or the long-suffering Mr GG) through no fault of their own and then had to seek out said boy or boys and apologise, asking them to forgive me. God has blessed me with wonderfully forgiving children who are never slow to tell me how much they love me and reassure me that they forgive me for my short-comings. Yet another thing that I give thanks for often.
Today’s dare is to start reacting with love rather than irritation and to seek out areas in life where I can (realistically) lower stress so that my reactions aren’t so likely to be negatively affected by circumstances. I’m onto it … it’s a work in progress …